Now that I decided to improve my patience, I’m realizing I’m not sure where to start. Roman and I were talking, and I think I need some concrete actionable steps. I’m the kind of person who loves a to-do list that I can check off.
First, I want to define patience, so I know what I’m working toward. I like this definition, “the capacity to endure delay, trouble, opposition, or suffering without becoming angry, frustrated, or anxious.”
I also need to remember that developing patience is a journey, not a destination. I won’t be perfectly patient at the end of February or really ever.
I’ve been studying a lot of resources, and I think I have a few good things to try to build my patience muscles. We need to remember that patience is a skill anyone can develop with practice and self-compassion. Start small, choose practices that resonate with you, and enjoy the journey towards a more peaceful and accepting mindset.
Building Patience Muscles:
• Pray for help and Opportunities to be patient.
• Start small: Choose everyday situations where we can practice patience, like intentionally waiting in a longer line or dealing with slow internet. Acknowledge our initial frustration, then use mindfulness techniques like meditation or deep breathing to manage it.
• Engage in patience-building activities: Hobbies like gardening, fishing, or playing chess, which require waiting and focus help us build patience. I like the idea of spending time in nature, where waiting becomes part of appreciating the slow pace and beauty.
• Be kind to ourselves: Remember, we need to be patient with ourselves too! Developing patience takes time and effort. Don't get discouraged by setbacks, celebrate your progress, and enjoy the journey.
• Practice acceptance: Accept that things won't always go according to plan and that progress rarely happens instantly. Accepting reality can take the pressure off and foster a more patient attitude.
• Reframe situations: Instead of viewing delays or setbacks as frustrations, see them as opportunities to learn, grow, or simply appreciate the present moment.
• Consider the bigger picture: Remind yourself that the current inconvenience is temporary and unlikely to impact the long-term outcome. See things from different perspectives, like that of the person you're waiting for or the bigger goal you're working towards.
• Practice gratitude: Reflect on the positive aspects of your life and the things you're grateful for. This can shift your focus away from frustrations and foster a more patient mindset.
Additional Resources:
• Books: "The Power of Patience" by M.J. Ryan, "Peace is Every Step" by Thich Nhat Hanh
• Apps: Calm, Headspace, Insight Timer